Tag Archives: mass murders

Hello World!

Welcome to my improved blog on “Understanding Abandonment Issues and The Psychology of Human Behaviors.” I became professional aware of  unresolved abandonment issues at the age of 18, directly out of high school. I was chosen to be part of a team of 13 Americans who joined 13 Columbians to set-up and run the first YMCA Camp in of Bogota, Columbia in 1967. In our last camp session, that summer, all of the youths were from an orphanage. I exchanged one of the mine youth with another one from another American Counselor because he was so needing. The youth, who looked like he was 11 was actually 15 years old. He looked at me and said, “you are going to hurt me!” I ensured him that I wasn’t going to hurt him. For the next week I gave him all of my love and attention. It wasn’t until the last day of the camp session that I heard what he had told me.

He was getting ready to get on his bus back to the orphanage. I was getting ready to board my bus to the airport to visit two more countries in South America  before flying back to American to start college that fall.  It was not until the youth walked up to me with tears in his eyes and said to me again, “I told you that you were going to hurt me,” that I heard him. All I could do was to hug him and tell him that I was sorry and cry!

I didn’t know the impact of my actions, as good as they were! I didn’t understand how to show him the good that had come out of this experience. I didn’t know how to terminate a relationship so the person didn’t feel worse off for meeting me. For all of these reasons I changed my major at George Williams College (Founder of the YMCA) from becoming a YMCA Administrator to studying Group Work and become a Clinical Social Worker and College Instructor.

I began writing on the subject in graduate school and in 1977published my first book on the subject, Thank You for Loving Me! The Psychology of Loving and Healing  in 1984.  In 2008 the Revised publication of Thank You for Loving Me! The Psychology of Loving and Healing was released, alone with a Personal Growth Journal titled, What I Must Give Myself…First! Someone Else Cannot Give Me What I Am Not Able or Willing to Give Myself.

These two books are Self-Help books that can enhance one’s treatment in therapy. They don’t read like a normal book, but assist in facilitating a “corrective learning experience!”  I spent 20 years writing and rewriting Thank You for Loving Me! It started out as my diary doing my years in therapy and then I developed it for the use in the treatment of adolescents and adults in individual and group therapy.

I am proud that 2014 marks the seventh year that my blog has been up and running! I have had readers from at least 189 different countries and I thank each of you. I thank you for reading  my articles and adding your comments to my posts. If you have not already voted in all of the surveys, please click on “Surveys” on the sidebar, and participate in each of them. Your participation and feedback is appreciated!

Also, please continue to purchase and read my two books on Amazons and don’t forget to submit your reviews.

As an Author, Speaker, and Consultant, I am available to lecture at your school or college; or keynote a speaking event; or facilitate  workshops for your institution, organization, or business. Speaking/Training fees will be reduced if an order of books are included in the event.

Please email me at jrayrice@itsallaboutabandonment.com

My Passport is current and my bags can be packed for international or national engagements!

 

Should Americans Abandon Their Rights to Bear Arms?

Since March 10, 2009 44 have been killed in the United States in mass murders. A total of 200 have been killed in American in 50 mass murders since Virginia Tech in April 16, 2007. (ABCNews, April 4, 2009)

Please vote on the question below. Your comments are welcome!

 

 



The Common Denominators of Unresolved Abandonment Issues and Guns in Mass Murders

I have been writing and giving examples of how communications and interactions between individuals, groups, and societies can cause abandonment issues. Left unresolved these issues can damage our self-esteem, impart our problem-solving abilities, and contribute to some too act violent toward others and themselves. Sometimes, these events affect us so severely and often that they can be the driving force behind some of the most serve acts of violence and taking of innocent lives.

The following are some of the high profile murders that have been in the news from April 5, 2007 and dating back to Christmas of 2008. I believe that all of these individuals has unresolved abandonment issues that are at the root of their actions, along with the asset to guns!

I would like for you to read and listen to the information provided in the following links that reveal their unresolved abandonment issues. Afterward please give your comments and understanding about these issues and actions.

April 5, 2009
“Police: Dad Killed Kids Because Wife Was Leaving” (Phuonge Le, AP, ABCNews)

James Harrison’s unresolved abandonment issues were: a) his wife betrayed him in an affair, and b) she was going to leave him for another man.

April 4, 2009
“Gunman ‘Lying in Wait’ Kills 3 Pittsburgh Officers” (Plushnick-Masti and Dan Nephin, AP, ABCNews)

Richard Poplawski’s possible unresolved abandonment issues were: a) loss of job, b) fear of loss of his right to bear-arms, and c) possible eviction by his mother for his dog urinating in her home.

April 3, 2009
“As NY Gunman’s Life Unraveled, He Took Others’ (Rubinkam, AP, ABCNews)

Jiverly Wong’s possible unresolved abandonment issues were: a) loss of job, b) his failure to speak English well, c) his lack of acceptance, and d) in his eyes the Center’s failure to teach him English and provide the America Dream.

March 13, 2009
“Doubts Arise Over Threat by German Teenage Gunman” (Leske, ABCNews)

Tim Kretschmer’s possible unresolved abandonment issues were: a) feelings of abandonment/rejection by classmates and school, and b) feelings of depression due to him lacking to successfully bond with family and friends.

March 16, 2009
“Slain Ala. Mother Mourned as Unique, Independent” (Hunter, AP, ABCNews)

Michael McLendon’s possible unresolved abandonment issues were: a) his failure to become a law-enforcement officer, and b) his family failure to contribute to his success in his eyes.

March 22, 2009
“Oakland Seeking Answers in Police Killings” (Jesse McKinley, NYTimes)

Lovelle Mixon’s possible unresolved abandonment issues were: a) his fear of returning to prison on a warrant, and b) despondent over not being able to find employment.


February 24, 2009
“Boy Shoots Father’s Pregnant Girlfriend” (ABCNews)

Jordan Brown’s possible unresolved abandonment issues were: a) his fear of the loss of love from his father, b) failure to be prepared for a blended-family, c) failure to bond with father’s girlfriend, two daughter, and new baby, and d) giving him a gun when he does not have the maturity to resolve conflicts or talk about his feelings.

December 25, 2008
“Police: Burns from fire altered ‘killer Santa’ plan” (CNN)

Bruce Jeffrey Pardo’s possible unresolved abandonment issues were: a) his divorced from his wife, b) his feelings of abandonment from his family and his wife’s family, and c) his mother siding with his wife during the divorce.

It’s All About Abandonment! Do not forgive to vote on the issue of guns!

Eric C. Hanson Treatment Issues

When a person murders another person, they are reacting to unresolved abandonment issues, from either that person or someone else in their life. This act of taking another person’s life produces unresolved abandonment issues for the people that loved and knew them. Their loves ones are left with a sense of profound loss from their sudden and needless separation from the person they love. Their love ones are left with questions like, why has this happened and how could anyone commit such a crime or action. They may ask why would God allow this to happen to their loved ones. Each of these questions produces feelings of abandonment.

Eric C. Hanson in DuPage County, Illinois has been convicted of beating to death his sister and brother-in-law in Aurora, IL, and then shooting to death his parents in Naperville, IL. This article is about the psychology and the development of the pathology to carryout these acts. We will examine his behaviors and actions from a different point of view, abandonment. The abandonment issues of Eric Hanson’s mental illness and actions will be examined in the hope that others will have a better understanding of his thought process and actions. This examination is not done to excuse his behaviors and actions or lessen the seriousness of his acts. This is written in the hope of providing a new awareness and understanding to how his mental illness and behaviors are…all about abandonment.

To read more click here…