“Like an unchecked cancer, hate corrodes the personality and eats away its vital unity. Hate destroys a man's sense of values and his objectivity. It causes him to describe the beautiful as ugly and the ugly as beautiful, and to confuse the true with the false and the false with the true.”
Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
Dr. King’s quote speaks to the politics of humankind. You only have to look at the behaviors and actions of how we can tell a lie long enough, and offer enough, to be preceded as the truth. Our politicians do this to us to influence public opinion so they can lie to us. We quote our bibles and our belief systems to justify our prejudices, hateful acts, and discrimination against people or groups we do not like. To read the whole article click here and please comment.
President Obama on Marriage
When you support The President you are supporting yourself, your
family, your friends, and your nation. Please listen to his video and contribute to his Re-Election so we can continue task of the building of a Better America...a Caring
America...and a Caring World.
Watch and remember what Barack Obama has done for this nation.
Take action and support his Re-Election!
“Hatred paralyzes life; love releases it.
Hatred confuses life; love harmonizes it.
Hatred darkens life; love illuminates it.”
Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
When do you need to look at abandoning your belief system? Here are my thoughts! Click here!
Coming Soon: The Link Between Terrorism and Unresolved Abandonment Issues!
By: J. Ray Rice, M.S.W., A.C.S.W.
We must begin to look at everyday events, behaviors, issues, and reactions as expressions of how well we are caring for people. You must understand that our thoughts and actions are causing the destruction of people and societies.Let's have a discussion about this topic. What prejudice(s) are you willing to overcome to secure the rights of others? This is the question Lt. Daniel Choi a West Point Alumni is asking President Obama and all Americans!
Look at how physical and emotional abuse damage people and cause them to act-out at loved ones and society. We must continue to facilitate corrective learning experiences in individuals and in society. We must stop destroying people, because they will just destroy us in return!
We must accept the differences in each other and build upon our strengths and common needs! You have the same rights as everyone else! If your rights are denied, my rights are not secured!
This is why we must resolve abandonment issues by providing corrective learning experiences that teach people how to love and accept themselves and others.
People! Let the people live and let the conflicts die! (Rice, pp. 236-237, 2008)
Early last month, we had our second general layoff. I survived...I know this firm is using this downturn as an excuse to take advantage of a bad situation and kill jobs necessarily... I would never have a shoot'em up there. They paid me for 10 years, so far! I predict I won't survive the next layoff. That is when there is no point to continue. (George Sodini, 4/24/09) [It is clear that George feared that his firm was going to abandon him. I believe his statement suggests that his firm may have been at-risk if they had fired him.]
I was invited to a picnic, and I went. An older women there, out of the blue, asked me if I liked high school. They quickly asked if I was picked on very much. Interesting why she would ask that. But thanks, I already know what the problem is, but a solution eludes me. (George Sodini, 5/25/09)
[Here George didn't have the courage to ask someone who could read the effects of bullying how was he showing those effects.]
I guess some of us were simply meant to walk a lonely path. I have slept alone for over 20 years. Last time I slept all night with a girlfriend it was 1982. Proof I am total malfunction. Girls and women don't even give me a second look ANYWHERE. There is something Blatantly wrong with me that NO goddam person will tell me what it is. (George Sodini, 7/20/09) [There is another major unresolved abandonment issues here, but George avoid discussing this event that has affected his ability in trusting women.]
The biggest problem of all is not having relationships or friends, but not being able to achieve and acquire what I desire in those or many others areas. Everything stays the same regardless of the effort I put in. If I had control over my life then I would be happier. But for over 30 years, I have not. (George Sodini, 8/2/09) [He felt that he has failed. He doesn't know how to control his life without having control of others, which is model he developed in. This is relationship pattern he knows and he doesn't have the skills and attributes to achieve different results.]8/3/09 - "Christ paid for EVERY sin, so how can I or you be judged by GOD for a sin when the penalty was ALREADY paid." [Here George explains why he believes God would not abandon him for his actions.]
Also, any of the "Practice Papers" left on my coffee table I used or the notes in my gym bag can be published freely. I will be dead. Some people like to study that stuff. Maybe all this will shed insight on why some people just cannot make things happen in their life, which can potentially benefit others. (George Sodini, 8/3/09) [The best way to analysis George and his actions are in terms of abandonment issues. Unresolved abandonment issues is what we need to be identifying and treating from birth. Resolving abandonment issues will also assist the family members and friends who have lost love ones or harm in George's actions. Society would benefit greatly if we can learn the lessons here, because they will not stop until we get it right!]
"Lee Ann Valdiserri had my baby in early 1991. Haven't seen her since she was about four months into it." [This unresolved abandonment issue contribute to George not having sex since 1990 when he was 29 years old. It also reinforce his mistrust of having relationships with women. The date of the last time sexual relationship doesn't match his 7/20/09 post, but the unresolved abandonment is real if he has a child that he has never bonded with and protected.]
"The last thing they need "is being discharged while being gay!"
Telling someone to not be themselves is stupid and it shows a lack of respect for our fellow human being! The following nations allow gays to serve openly in their army forces:You are who you are!
When you respect life... you respect all-life!Not just the ones you prefer!
The reason my mother doesn't like me to date older men is because my dad was 20 years older than her. And he already had three kids, my third older brothers. She says an older man wants you to cook for them, clean, do a lot of things, but they don't treat you right sometimes. And she's afraid that might happen to me. And it did happen...(Elstein & Noy, 1997, p. 30)
By: J. Ray Rice, A.C.S.W.
First, I want thank each of you that have answered my surveys and I encourage you to do the same. For me, abandonment is a normal consequence of all interactions and communications between people and by people. Naturally, some abandonment experiences leave us with more traumatic issues than others and their impact should not to be minimized by anyone.
In my opinion, it is to very one’s best interest for them to go into therapy at some point and time in their life. It is difficult sometimes to go through life’s experiences and not have them affect you someway. It takes strength to look at ourselves and discuss how life events and experiences may be affecting our interpersonal interactions or self-esteem. It is not a shameful act to seek the advice or counseling of a trained mental health professional.
The following individual polls result can be viewed by clicking on view result under the vote button at the end of each survey. Here are the results from the five current surveys on this site. Please keep in mind that the results today may be different that those given at the time of the posting.
I welcome your comments and observations. So, please give them!
the question of: Who Should Abandon
Their Position –
Hamas! (As of 03/14/09) 33% said
the question of: Should We Be Talking
with Our Enemies?
(As of 03/14/09) 81% said Yes!
the question of: When You Hear or See
the Name…Dr. King does it
Remind You that He was a Reverend?
(As of 03/14/09) 60% said No!
the question of: My Most Recent
Abandonment Experience Is?
(As of 03/14/09) 22% said, “I experienced rejection!”
the question of: What is your “Core
(As of 03/14/08) 17%
said, “I experienced emotion, physical, or sexual
Please cast your vote on these questions and give your comments to these results.
This book will change the way you feel about yourself.
This book will assist you in changing the way you interact with others!
Order yours now!
Congratulations President Obama on Winning the Nobel Peace Prize!
"Take the first step in faith. You do not
have to see the whole staircase.
Just take the first step."
Martin Luther King, Jr.
A “corrective learning experience,” has been described in others writings by this author as events, experiences, or acts that allow us the opportunities and resources to correct or heal an abandonment experience. This includes our self-esteem, ability to bond, love, and trust; as well as our desires to destroy, harm, or kill others and ourselves.
To read how the election of Barack Obama would provide "corrective learning experiences" to individuals, groups and nations...click here!
Thank You for Loving Me! is dedicated:
"To those who love, and to those who want to be loved!"
James A. Cox, Editor-in-Chief of The Midwest Book Review wrote:
"Thank You for Loving Me! is about the practical psychology in a poetic format of loving and healing based on John Rice's self-help, self-improvement seminar. It is about the necessity of taking risk, pursuing dreams; the role of friendship and the nature of love in the human experience; the impediments we all heir to; the concepts, values, and standards we all held to (by ourselves as well as by others); and the critical role of gratitude in peace of mind and personal tranquility. The psychology is sound, the style simple, the message elegant, the book timely and timeless."
As I prepared to presenter my seminar...It's All About Abandonment, June 7th at the 2008 Conference of the National Association of Social Worker - Florida Chapter, I decided to share it with the world. It is that important to me! You will need Adobe to view this file. If you do not have Adobe Reader you can download it free by clicking on this link!
I ask that you respect my copyright to this presentation, as well as all of the articles I have posted. Please give me credit for the material and provide a link-back to this site so others can join our learning community.
My short and long-rang goals are to provide:
Please feel free to email me your interest in any of these goals to: email@example.com
Click here to read...The Answers to Human Behaviors! Please add your comments to the discussion.
May 15th is Bloggers Unite for Human Right! I have chosen HIV/AIDS. They both cause people to feel and experience abandonment. In fact it is causing children worldwide to be orphans. For information on human rights of people with HIV/AIDS worldwide, please click here.
1,000,000 Africans were used to test the oral vaccine for polio. Do not think you know the truth!
Click to watch...AidsOrigins! (This Blogger, by providing a link on the worldwide web, is not claiming that any individual, company, or nation in this film are responsible for anything!)
What are the ethical reasons to the following questions and behaviors?
Listen to the Underlining Abandonment Issues in the Lack of Ethics on Buzzing with John and read a new article on the same.
Also take 12-minutes to listen to Olberman: Bush Interview Unforgivable.
Man only kills others and himself in wars. The conflicts live on to be fought another day and another. So why are we in such a rush to die? Unresolved abandonment issues? Are we learning something in this process? Killing each other and producing more guns and others weapons of mass destruction with laws allowing us to kill more is the problem. This is not the solution!
Remember these words and ask yourself if we have learned our lesson? History said, no!
Right now visitors to this blog are from over 185 countries and I know we all do not share the same belief systems, but everyone can relate to this point:
Jesus said, "Father forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing."
Over two-thousand years later and we still do not know what we are doing...Jesus did not die, he was murdered! To read...Let The Conflicts Die!
Do not forget to listen to the April 14th airing of Let The Conflicts Die on BlogTalkRadio!
“A society abandons its citizens,
Its’ citizens abandon its’ society.
What do you have?
A highly dangerous and dysfunctional society!”
7.3 Million Chidren Has A Parent in Prison in the U.S.
I hope that you have already read the article…Social Policies and Laws Cause Abandonment.
That writing and video outlines the concept that social polices and laws cause abandonment issues
and experiences to its citizens. The mental health of a nation is directly affected by that governments’ polices and procedures. The effects on the war on drug and the war on crime are the same.
1. You begin by increasing the world’s ability to kill every man, women, and child in
the production of weapons and their worldwide distribution
2. You then reduce the cost of government by cutting services to the population of
your society that does not vote or have poor representation in government.
3. You then reduce or close your inpatient psychiatric hospitals and discharge these
residents into the community and streets without the means to support
or maintain themselves.
4. At the same time you cut the budgets to community programs that service your
a. drug treatment
b. alcohol treatment
c. mental health treatment
d. poverty assistance
e. child and youth services
f. job training
5. Now introduce a cheap drug into minority communities and give it prime time
coverage by every television station, at the same time.
6. Help things alone by exposing every child to drugs in school by showing them all of the
different kinds of drugs and there effects.
7. Limit or not provide treatment or rehabilitation in your prison system along with no
treatment for its prisoners’ drug, alcohol, or mental health issues during their
prison stay or after their release.
8. Develop laws that directly affect the 51.8% recidivism rate of your treatment
population by increasing their prison sentencing after three arrests and convictions
to life in prison.
9. Pass federal sentencing laws that provide for a longer prison sentencing for your
poorest and minority citizens that use the cheaper form of a same drug that your
upper-middle class and rich citizens use. Click here to help to change that!
10. Now build those much needed prison beds in white rural areas of the country that
provide them jobs, support industries, increase their tax base, increase their representatives in
government, with a population that cannot vote or be represented by a
government that sentences and maintains them.
11. Now privatize your prison system so it provides endless income to corporations
and its shareholders.
12. Now allow the private corporations to put to work their personal property
(prisoners) to earn more money for the corporations and its shareholders.
13. Do not place requirements on these private corporations’ recidivism rate to decrease
in order for them to be able to receive more personal property so that they can
earn money off the prisoners and pay them pennies on the dollars for their labor
in order to produce more revenue for the corporations and its shareholders.
No one questioned me in my other articles I stated that, "we need to have a Social Worker for every 40 students in our schools from Pre-School or Kindergarten though College to provide individual, group, family and multi-family therapy. We do not want to acknowledge the level of pathology that existence within people but all you need to do is to turn on your TV or read a newspaper and you can see it. It is my professional opinion that all schools from Pre-School or Kindergarten though College need to be therapeutic schools! This means that they provide therapy for all of their students and all of their families.
One cannot go swimming without getting wet. One cannot grow up with major unresolved abandonment issues, events, and actions in their lives and not be affected. Some of us can handle these experiences and use them to become a better person. Some of us cannot handle these experiences and they cause us not to feel good about society and ourselves. Support is needed for both situations.
Some of us are acknowledging that our planet is sick and it is in the process of killing life because our actions are killing it. We also need to acknowledge that people are sick and that is why they are killing each other and themselves. Sticking our heads in the sand does not work with the environment, nor does it work in society. Our goose is cooked in both examples.
My mentor H.C. Smith, Ph.D., wrote to others and me today (02/15/08): "John you are at the leading edge as a thought leader on the subject of "Abandonment" and the examples continue to be demonstrated. The NIU event is just another of many you have predicted and projected. Stay the course my friend." Your message is very timely. Many are called. Few are chosen."
As a society we are paying for the human conditions people are living in, fighting in, and dying in. The call to allow students to carry a gun to school so they can protect themselves should show us how sick our society has become.
All behaviors have meaning! To read the article on Steven Kazmierczak click here.
The third edition of Thank You for Loving Me! The Psychology of Abandonment, Healing, and Loving has been released for purchase online at CreateSpace and Amazon.com. This is one of three books by J. Ray Rice, M.S.W., A.C.S.W., that will be released in 2008.
Thank You for Loving Me! has been rewritten over 200 times since its first copyright in 1977. It started out as a personal growth journal the author kept during therapy. When he was a graduate student in training to become a therapist he realized that he could not take someone else to a point or level he had not reached himself. To achieve this end he began his personal growth journal that grew into a book that he has been written over 36 years.
Lessons in life have to be experienced and learned. You just cannot tell people what to do and how to do it. They have to learn! Thank You for Loving Me is a book that you will read and reread to understand the life lessons in it. The author took 36 years to write this book and friends that have read and reread the book before are still learning and seeing new lessons in the book.
The format of the book is written in proses. Prose is not poetry; prose is a matter-of-fact form of writing.
Remember the Chinese proverb, “Give a person a fish and feed them for the day, teach them how to fish and feed them for a lifetime." Thank You for Loving Me teaches you how to love and heal so you can love and heal a lifetime!
Brief explanation of the book:
Anticipated market for the book
Will the book be illustrated?
Format of the manuscript
Can I order a copy of the second edition, published in 1997 without the illustrations?
Can I give a review on the 1st and 2nd editions of... Thank You For Loving Me?